This is a very belated post, as with many of my posts of late detailing (in)significant details of my life which are more than 6 months old (yes, some of those things that you thought I made recently, were done and dusted half a year ago, oops!). Pardon me as I try and move the writing along. Now, where was I? Ah yes, this post. As late as this might be, and as guilty as I am of being a bad friend, I’d like to think that my words are better late than never…
I was feeling very lost after I passed my viva in February this year. I got my degree, snagged a new job, was happy with it, and there was absolutely no reason why I was feeling that way, but I was. I think I had a bit of a mental block when it came to things that I loved doing outside of work.
Whilst I am a very pragmatic person, I also like to live on the alternative side, where I feed off creativity and allow myself to get lost in the wonders that come with it. Many times, I was drunk in it and it was very addictive. I haven’t had this feeling in years, not since I dabbled a little in arts and craft when I was a teenager, and I only managed to say hello to that part of my life again when I moved to London. Getting elbow-deep in the kitchen, making food beautiful and feeding people I love with my creations stood at the very heart of this. And then, sometime earlier this year, I had a mental block. I couldn’t think out of the box, I stopped feeling inspired, and oh my, it was dreadful. I was like an addict being deprived of my vices that used to please and tease. I felt angsty and tense without these pleasures. I was also feeling desperate as I very much wanted to turn all this into something that I could do for a living, but the pragmatist in me struggled with the idea of taking the unfamiliar path and possibly not making ends meet with my grandiose ideas built on my meagre talent.
I confided a lot in E about this. And before I knew it, she handed me a gift one day with a heartfelt message on the card. I don’t want to reveal what was said but it was her words that really moved me and made me realise that I have a friend who has so much faith in me. Till today, I don’t think I deserve that kind of faith, but I am still very thankful for a friend who believes in me, even though I am just a pig which can’t fly. I made a mental promise to take lots of wonderful pictures with this lovely gift, which has become a staple in my food styling prop collection. I have taken many, I just haven’t got round to writing about them, so E, if you’re reading this, I just want to say THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, and I am putting your gift and words to good use! This photo isn’t much but it is the first one that I took with the board, and I’d just like to share it with everyone because it means so much to me.
[Photo subject: Blood oranges that I bought from Borough Market in March this year. I was fascinated with the way blood-red trails seep in and out of the orange pulp.]