Married Life Blooper #3: The Tale of Four Butt Cheeks

M and I were about to turn in for the night, after a particularly drawn-out and tiring day. As he hoisted the duvet  up to his neck, and snuggled under the covers, he mumbled, ‘Do you know that I love you very much?’

And I, being all manja, asked him the question that most men feared.

Me: Will you still love me when I grow fat?

M (half-asleep): I love you, no matter what.

Me: Even with the face of a char siew bao?

M (still half-asleep): Yes, of course.

Me: Even when I have four butt cheeks?

M (jolted awake): FOUR butt cheeks?!

Me: Yes, four.

M: Why would there be four? Where would the extra two cheeks be?

Me (*rolls eyes* not that M could see them in the dark): Underneath the first two, LAH!

M: *BURSTS INTO LAUGHTER*

Me: …

The shit we say.

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