Write Me For Another Ten

We don’t celebrate anniversaries with much fanfare, but I guess being together for ten years today is good enough a reason to celebrate…with words, that is.

Throughout the decade together, we wrote to each other quite a fair bit, more so when we were living in different countries, and less when the daily grind got in the way. We may not be the best writers, but we find much solace in words, especially when they come from the other. I remember eagerly checking my mailbox after a harried day at work for a letter signed ‘With love from London’, doing a happy dance when there is word from the Mister, and saving the letter for a read at bedtime when I am all showered, relaxed and ready to devour his comforting words that evening.

This morning, as I roused from restless sleep, M handed me an envelope stuffed with letters that he had written over the past four months. He is due to work the night shift this evening, and wouldn’t be able to spend our tenth anniversary with me. Knowing that I would likely need encouragement as I would be putting the two kids to bed myself at the most trying time of the day, he asked me to save the letters for when the kids have gone to bed. 

I couldn’t wait. Of course, I couldn’t. I tore the envelope open and savoured every word penned in his doctor’s scribble after dropping F at school. 

He chided me on Whatsapp, “I took so long to write the letters and yet, you finished reading them so quickly! They were supposed to last you through the night.”

“I read your letters over and over again. They will last me a lifetime”, I argued. 

So, write me for another ten years, won’t you, darling? And if I have ten lifetimes, I’d want for nothing. 

Happy Tenth, my love. 

Married Life Blooper #5: When Your Husband Knows You Better Than You Do

With the second pregnancy, I have been getting Braxton Hicks contractions and those painful ones way earlier than when I was carrying Faith. Yesterday night, I was resting in bed, timing the contractions whilst the husband kept me company.

At one point, after about three hours of frequent contractions, the pain, intensity and frequency somewhat abated and baby resumed its movements. M noticed that I wasn’t as bothered as before, and asked if the contractions were still coming on.

“I think we are good for now, but who knows, being the sound sleeper that you are, you might suddenly get woken up by piercing cries of a newborn! OOOOH-YEEEEAK OOOOH-YEEEEAK!” I teased.

“Yeah, and then you will go..M, HURRY UP! GIVE ME A TOWEL, MY PRISTINE WHITE BEDSHEETS ARE ALL BLOODSTAINED!!!!” He retorted.

Well, true that. He knows he married a clean freak. *shrugs*

  

Dear Faith: Two and A Half

Dear Faith,

It’s been a year since Mama wrote to you. I had planned to write to you every six months, but things got a little busy when you turned two, and I didn’t get round to penning my thoughts down then. Mama is deeply sorry about that…

You see, I was *just* pregnant with your little sibling then. Whilst it was a much easier first trimester this time (Mama didn’t hurl at all even though I was mostly nauseated), I didn’t want to give up any minute I could spend with you. I took less photos, wrote less often on the blog and in my diary, and soaked up the here-and-now whenever we spent time together. Mama knew that we wouldn’t have much one-on-one time once your sibling is born, and I wanted us to be…us.

And us, it has been. Mama may not have been able to take you out as often as before owing to the difficulty of catching up with your Speedy-Gonzales-esque sprints with a growing bump, and your increasing requests to be carried when I am physically unable to do so as the pregnancy progresses, but we spent a lot of time at home and in the neighbourhood making believe with your growing family of soft toys (including Elephant, Minnie, Bear Bear, Pooh Bear, Olaf, Bunny and many more!), playing with your kitchen, making burgers and ice cream cones out of Lego, singing, dancing, playing musical instruments, reading, blowing and catching (I blow, you catch) bubbles on the balcony and even baking. Oh yes, we cuddle lots too. Papa has been taking you for twice-weekly swims, when you would demand to sit on his back whilst he ferries you around in the water, and squeal in delight when you playfully push his head down under; I would slowly make my way across the pool and wait in the shallow areas for you, if and when you decide to mess with the water jets and scoop water in and out with your sandcastle-building toys, you know, scaled-down activities that Mama can manage whilst being heavily pregnant. Such wonderful times together.

Through it all, we continue to be surprised by how much of a little adult you are and how quickly you are growing up. You say the most astounding things and ask the most unexpected questions. “Can you manage, Mama?” when you see me having difficulty in completing a task. “Is your stomach painful? You must wear this!” when you catch me in the middle of a contraction or a bout of pelvic pain, and run off to get my maternity belt from the wardrobe. “Mama, I help you!” when you see me having difficulties pulling up my shorts as I struggle to bend over the rock-hard bump that is your little sibling. You make your demands for our affection loud and clear and show yours for us unabashedly. “Papa, I want hug and kiss and pat pat.” “Mama, kisssssss!” When you catch me in tears, you fling whatever you have in your hands aside and run to hand me a piece of tissue paper and give me a hug, often rubbing my back gently and whispering, “It’s okay, Mama” as you do so. Whilst I am proud and thoroughly delighted at the being you have blossomed into, your acts of love, words and knowing tantrums do little to assuage my guilt.

The tantrums…they could be ignited by something as simple as wanting Mama instead of Papa to brush your teeth, or Mama being unable to carry you as I am in pain. Whatever the reason, I know it has to do with your attachment to and longing for me, especially with a little sibling on the way. To watch you cry helplessly and know that you do not understand why I am unable to do certain things with you…breaks my heart into a million pieces. On occasions when I was unable to give in to your requests and reasoning failed to work, I had to be stern and I raised my voice at you . You, being the sweet, loving angel that you are, settled down quickly most of the time when I did that and you have no idea how sad I am to know that you did it out of fear of making me unhappy. “I want Mama to be happy”, you would say once you have calmed down. I often weeped, after I put you to bed, and mulled over that guilt for days after, because I know why you were upset on those occasions, and the thing is I don’t know how to reconcile your needs with what I can provide at this point.

Things are going to change very drastically when your little sibling arrives, how so…I do not know. I simply pray that we can go through the transition as a family of four, no matter how hard it may be for all of us and trust that everything will turn out alright.

Faith, you may not understand this now but I want you to know that I love you very much, much more than you will ever know. I want you to know that even though I may not be able to give you my full attention in the near future, I will try my best to be a doting and present mother to you and your little sibling, and a supportive wife to Papa. Please give me time to be good at balancing my different acts, and I promise Mama will be back in no time, taking you out on one-on-one frozen yogurt dates and runs to the playground. There will be lots of cuddles too, as many as I can dole out, and most importantly, as many as you would like me to give.

You will always be my baby.

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Loving you always,

Mama

A Local Delight to Read: Stacey Goes To The Peranakan Museum

[SPONSORED POST*] We are big, BIG fans of books (in fact, we bought F more books than toys or clothes, most of the latter are gifts from family and friends!) and one of the things I like to do with F after I pick her up from preschool on weekday afternoons is to read. We have amassed a variety of tales in F’s growing library, but one genre that I didn’t get my hands on relates to our local context. Up until recently, that is!

Lianne Ong, author of Stacey Goes To The National Museum, has released the second book in the Stacey & The Museums series in partnership with the National Heritage Board, and this one really caught my eye as it introduces the Peranakan culture to children.

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When I first received the book, I was a little concerned that the prose might be too advanced for F, who is just 2.5 years old now but looking at how F pounced on the book when I whipped it out and how she gushed over the brightly-coloured illustrations, I needn’t have worried that this was out of her league. She pored over the book and pointed excitedly at the pictures, exclaiming, “Pretty dress!” when she spotted the kebaya, and thumbed every page whilst giving a live commentary of what the illustrations depicted before she handed me the book and asked to be read to. As I went through the story with her, I was brought back to the time when we visited the Peranakan Museum with F; she was about one then.

I thought the book is an excellent platform to introduce the Peranakan culture to children, especially when Lianne takes bits and bobs of the exhibits and weaves them into a fantasy where a statue takes Stacey through the museum! I see it as the perfect guidebook for children to navigate and relate the content to the exhibits in the museum; this is what I would do when we take F to the Peranakan Museum in future, as F is very fond of and quick at pointing out things she sees, and relating them to what she has learnt in songs and books these days. I reckon the excursion, with the tale in hand, will make for a memorable adventure for F (and really, it makes it so easy for us parents to stir our children’s interest in local culture and history, I would be clueless as to how to do that otherwise).

We can’t wait for the third book in the series to be released; if the approach is similar to what Lianne has done for the first two books, then I think we might have ourselves another excellent children’s guidebook to one of Singapore’s other museums.

*I was gifted one copy of Stacey Goes To The National Museum and one copy of Stacey Goes To The Peranakan Museum. No additional monetary compensation has been received. All opinions expressed are entirely my own and written according to my experience in using the products/services. Sponsors have been notified that I am not obliged to write a review upon receipt of sponsored service/items, should I find the products/services unsuitable.

The Stacey & The Museums Series are sold here. Like the Stacey & The Museums Facebook page for updates on book releases in the series and readings!

Look Ma, My (Clean and Soft) Hands!

[SPONSORED POST*] I didn’t used to carry hand sanitisers with me unless I was on holidays. After Faith was born, I became a clean freak and lugged at least one bottle from a certain brand everywhere I went because I didn’t want her to fall ill and hand sanitisers are real lifesavers in making sure that we emerge from poop/pee accidents (mostly) unscathed when there isn’t a bathroom in sight.

For more than two years, the hand sanitiser did its job, but left my hands smelling like alcohol (not unlike the days when I had to spray my hands down with 70% ethanol whilst working in the research lab) and feeling very, VERY dry. I was keen to look for an alternative but never got down to it. Most hand sanitisers that are on the market contain alcohol anyway.

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Then, Su-Lin from Our Lifestyle Shop gifted us with the latest kid on the block, the safeHands 7 Oz Bundle Pack ($59.70) that consists of three bottles of alcohol-free hand sanitisers (in assorted scents), which changed my life, quite literally. My hands were no longer dry. I no longer reek of alcohol; instead the sanitiser leaves a pleasant, subtle scent if I choose to use the scented ones (Cucumber Mint and Clean Linen). The foam dispensed feels good on the hands (and thrills F to bits with its texture). It is very gentle on the skin (F has eczema and has not reacted to safeHands at all). I have one bottle in my car and have barely made a dent in the bottle despite using about four pumps daily since the middle of November 2013. Granted, it’s not cheap at almost $20 for a bottle, but you get a whopping 7oz of product in each bottle (more than the usual sanitisers on the market), and considering that one full pump suffices for sanitising purposes, you do get a lot of mileage out of one bottle.  I’d say you pay for quantity AND quality, especially when it’s non-toxic, non-drying, alcohol-free, non-flammable and non-irritating, and is the only FDA-registered, EPA-recognised and USDA-approved hand sanitiser that kills MRSA, VRE and C-diff. SOOOO much win!

I have just one nagging thought about the safeHands sanitiser. It’s too big for me to lug in my diaper bag…I mean, you CAN, but I’d much prefer a travel-sized one for outings, especially when a single pump gives you sufficient product to eliminate germs. Now, THAT would be perfect! I’d say the 7oz bottles are great for keeping in cars and on desktops for when you need to sanitise your hands.

GIFT WITH PURCHASE:

To kick off the new year, we have our first giveaway for you! Receive a free sample of Drain Blast (two tablets good for a total o two uses; the full-sized product is good for 12 uses) with every purchase of the safeHands Bundle Pack! Enter the promotional code thepleasuremonger when you checkout. Promotion valid until 12 February 2015.

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More on Drain Blast:  It is a Green product (yay!) that is used to eliminate blockages in commercial and residential drains and to get rid of fruit flies in drains. The bacteria in the product chomps on the scum layers where the flies live, breed and eat, and therefore, eliminates the food source for the flies. When used as a biological mop water treatment (and by that, I mean you drop a table into a bucket of water meant for mopping), it removes food sources for other insects as well including cockroaches, disrupts the habitat that flies require for breeding and degrades organic material in cracks, crevices and drain lines. Be gone, you nasty bugs! I would LOVE to get my hands on this!

*I was gifted one safeHands 7oz Bundle Pack to review. No monetary gift was received. All opinions expressed are entirely my own and written according to my experience in using the products. Sponsors have been notified that I am not obliged to write a review upon receipt of sponsored items, should I find the products unsuitable.

You can shop online at Our Lifestyle Shop.